方韩之争开启中国脑残时代 ---- 作者:赤龙传说

    一些韩粉去韩氏饭店吃饭,点了“四两拔干片”,吃得津津有味。

    “这菜真棒!”他们一边吃一边说,满嘴油光可鉴。

    这时一个叫麦田的人走进饭店,看着他们狼吞虎咽的样子,忍不住说:“别吃啦,这菜是假的。”

    “去你妈逼的。”韩粉们抬起头,一边咀嚼着“四两拔干片”一边骂:“韩老板的菜不仅活儿好,而且很有味道,正合我们的胃口。韩老板可是天下第一名厨,你妈逼才是假的。”

    “这菜不是韩老板本人炒的……”麦田说:“韩老板根本就不会炒菜。”

    “这菜这么棒,你个脑残,滚开!”不等麦田说完,韩粉们又高声骂道。

    麦田摇摇头,叹息一声,走了。韩粉们继续大肆饕餮,韩老板躲在厨房里奸笑。

    过了一会儿,一个叫方舟子的人走了进来。看着韩粉们狼吞虎咽的样子,他也忍不住说:“别吃啦,这菜是假的。”

    “去你妈逼的。”韩粉们抬起头,一边咀嚼着“四两拔干片”一边骂:“韩老板的菜不仅活儿好,而且很有味道,正合我们的胃口。韩老板可是天下第一名厨,你妈逼才是假的。”

    “这菜是别人代炒的……”方舟子说:“韩老板根本就不会炒菜。”

    “这菜这么棒,你个脑残,滚开!”不等方舟子说完,韩粉们又高声骂道:“你妈逼的亲眼看见别人代炒了吗?你他妈逼的有什么证据?”

    方舟子却不走,站在旁边继续说:“韩老板当年参加厨艺大赛,其实是通过作弊才当上名厨的,这个证据我有。”

    “这菜不仅活儿好,而且很有味道,正合我们的胃口。你个脑残,滚开!”韩粉们说。

    “看看,菜里还有头发丝呢?”方舟子忽然指着“四两拔干片”说。

    “你妈逼的,有几根头发丝又咋样?照样比你那方氏肘子味道好。”韩粉们大笑。

    “还有指甲呢!”方舟子惊叫起来。

    “这傻逼太恶心人了!有几个指甲又咋样?不也比你那方氏肘子好吃多了。”韩粉们哈哈大笑,继续狼吞虎咽“四两拔干片。”

    方舟子不死心,站在饭桌旁边思考了一会儿说:“这菜其实是用地沟油炒出来的。”

    “这菜这么棒,不仅活儿好,而且很有味道,正合我们的胃口。你个脑残,你怎么还不滚!”韩粉们继续骂。

    “地沟油呢,我都有韩老板买地沟油的证据……这菜根本就是假的嘛。”方舟子提醒说。

    “地沟油炒的又咋样?韩老板的菜不仅活儿好,而且很有味道,正合我们的胃口。韩老板可是天下第一名厨,你妈逼才是假的。”韩粉们一边吃一边乐。

    “菜里还放了罂粟壳呢,我也有韩老板买罂粟的证据。”方舟子不依不饶:“罂粟壳,你们晓得的吧?”

    “罂粟又咋样?这菜不仅活儿好,而且很有味道。你妈逼的个方头脑残,你怎么还不去死?”韩粉们忍无可忍,一边大骂方舟子,一边故意大口大口地嚼着“四两拔干片”。

    “这菜是假的!”方舟子无奈,只好站在旁边一遍遍说。

    “这菜真棒!”韩粉们一遍遍骂:“你妈逼个脑残。”

    “这菜是假的!”

    “这菜真棒!你妈逼个脑残。”

    “假的!”

    “脑残!”

    “假的!”

    “脑残!”

    ……

    上帝抚掌含笑曰,恭喜中国从此进入脑残时代。

来源:http://blog.sina.com.cn/s/blog_69856b640100zkng.html

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韩粉的形象很符合,叨来叨去就那么几句挺寒黑方的话,方舟子的形象塑造的就不大准确了,方舟子说了韩粉不是他争取的对象,他们的智商普通太低,所以方舟子也不会对韩粉感到无奈,只会不屑

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